So, for those following my blog you will now know that we have decided to take the plunge and extend our family. A huge part of the reason this is happening now is down to my age. I turned 40 last year and had amazing celebrations and then at 40 years and 1 day my mind turned, yet again, to another baby. This time with an intensity I hadn’t felt before. My biological clock was ticking.
Turning 40 isn’t all bad. In fact I see turning 40 as a blessing in disguise. Although there was a ‘we must make the decision’ deadline now, it somehow gave us clarity. So, long story short, we are expecting our third child in May and we feel excited. The children are beside themselves reeling off numerous names for our approval each day and reading and singing to my ever growing bump. I am looking forward to wearing spring maternity clothes. I am excited about bringing baby home to a house in full bloom instead of the newborns that have come before in the cold winter months.
But all is not well people. I have been rather taken aback by some peoples reactions to our wonderful news. And not from friends or family, some of who were aware that we may have another baby at some point, but by people I actually don’t know that well. A parent of one of my children’s ‘acquaintances’, and the lady that occasionally does my eyebrows as a matter of fact. Upon revealing that we were indeed expecting, they proceeded to ask ‘oh…. was it planned?’
Now is it just me or is this just not appropriate? I mean, I get it if it was a close friend, a sister or brother, or close work colleague, but from someone that I hardly know?? It took the wind out of my sails I can tell you. I muttered something along the lines of, ‘yes, we have been thinking about it for a while…’ but what I really wanted to say was…’sorry, did you actually just ask me that question?’ It somehow felt like they were intruding on our sex life. They may as well have just asked ‘did you get far too carried away one drunken night and make a huge mistake that you are going to regret for the rest of your life, you silly girl?’ That, yes that, is exactly how it translated in my head.
So the point of this slightly ranty post is to just give a heads up to anyone who may discover that a very mild acquaintance of theirs who happens to be over 40, is pregnant. It is not ok to ask if it was planned for the above reasons. You should also take into account you are asking a rather hormonal and tired lady. She may or may not have already been asked this by some other passer by and she may, or may not have a rolling pin in her bag!
For your own safety, smile, say congratulations and butt the eff out.
Thanks for reading,